Writer's block

Some days it comes so easy to me--this sitting down and blogging. My fingers flow along the keyboard and the words seem to almost magically appear. Not lately. I sit and stare at a blinking cursor while my fingers wait for their opportunity to pounce, creating the most beautiful blog post in history. Yet, it doesn't happen (and probably won't in my life-time). The cursor just blinks.

Two or so weeks ago I started thinking and analyzing factors that could be hindering my ability to string words together in some sort of fashion that was even a tiny bit interesting to read. What is it? Why is it so hard lately? Sure we stay busy and on the go but that's really no different from our every day norm. Work is hectic and it seems there is always much to do, but still I've always tried to find a quiet time to write. Why is it so different now? Today came my answer. That figurative light bulb illuminated in my head and it all became clear. There. Are. No. Words.



No words to describe what a beautiful Thanksgiving we shared. Being surrounded by family that means the world to us and more.



No words adequate enough to ever thank our creator for the precious little souls who have been added to our family this year.



No words big enough to applaud these two women--the matriarchs of our family--for sacrificing, teaching, training, playing, loving, disciplining, adoring the generations following in their footsteps.



No words to describe the hysterical laughter shared between mom, daughter and future-daughter/sister as we embarked on our first Black Friday madness excursion. All. Night. Long.


*Can you feel the excitement?? We had our game faces on, baby!*

No words seem to fit well for moments when the whole family is gathered in one room with about twelve different conversations circulating, TV blaring, littles jumping on the air-mattress begging repeatedly, "Watch this!" me, standing in the background, and with the click of my camera trying to preserve these moments, knowing the camera is really not needed because these moments are permanently etched in my heart, you know, for safe keeping.



No words can describe it. No words can do it justice. But you know, in the midst of all the craziness, that this is what it is all about. It's about the little moments that blended together make lives. Lives that are full and blessed and so stinking great that, at times, you will think your heart just can't hold any more. It is on the verge of spontaneous combustion.



Life's little moments are about announcing to your kids in the middle of an afternoon rainstorm that it is precisely the perfect time to make an impromptu trip to the blessed land of Toys R Us. It's letting them walk around in the freezing, drizzling rain to get yet another use out of that $4 umbrella.





It's about finding the silver lining to any looming cloud.



It's about little giggles and funny faces.



It's about made up card games and cookies straight out of the oven.





It's about pulling out the Christmas decorations and going through each story tied and connected to each ornament. And they all have one.





It's about standing back and watching little eyes sparkle as they search for the perfect place for the ornament in hand.





It's about looking for the little, ordinary, every-day moments that go unnoticed. It's the packing lunches, kissing boo-boos, bed-time stories, late night cuddles, afternoon phone calls. It's please and thank-you and I love you's that come out of little mouths that melt the heart. It's the lit up eyes and giant bear hugs. These can be some of the most beautiful moments your memory will ever own.



It's about the noisy times, the quiet times, crying on a loved one's shoulder or hysterical laughter. You know, the kind that comes from deep within where your eyes are fully closed, nose crinkled, belly convulsing.





It's about appreciating every good and perfect gift that has been given from above. It's about praising God for all that He has given and continues to give. It's about being thankful--not just on Thanksgiving Day but every day. It's about teaching others and showing them how to look for the little blessings of life and sharing gratitude and thankfulness with them. Because no matter what we have or do not have, we are so blessed. I try to remind myself of that continually. I'm one thankful and blessed girl. I hope you're noticing your little blessings today.

Past, present and future...

As usual, we've had a lot going on lately. The third weekend of October rolled around (and if your an SEC fan you know exactly what that means!) so the hubs wisked me away to the Mountains for a weekend. With a little football thrown in the mix. ;)



I was so excited thinking about the trip. My parents took the boys for the whole weekend and while I waited for hubby to get off of work I relaxed and pampered. I soaked in bubble bath while listening to favorite tunes, gave myself a pedicure and enjoyed Sonic for supper while watching TiVo'd recordings of Project Runway. It was a truly girly night. And I needed that.





*Disclaimer: I realize that this is not a picture of my soaking in bubble bath but I promise this is much cuter. *

There's never a bad trip to Neyland. How can you be in that atmosphere, win or lose, and not enjoy it? We had awesome seats and to-die-for weather and despite the game outcome, it was a perfectly lovely night.


The mountains were nice with color scattered across the landscape. Since it was just the two of us we indulged in a Sky Lift trip up the mountain. We hadn't done that in a long time. We talked and walked the Gatlinburg streets holding hands. We felt like we were dating again. And it was nice. Just me and him. And we woke up to views like this from our balcony:





But so it goes that all good things must come to an end but turns out that just when one good thing ends another begins...if you let it.


We returned home to three squealing boys who were happy their mom and dad were home. Reunions are always the best with the warmest, sweetest hugs.

Then, when we weren't looking, Halloween crept up. And somehow my peanut turned five years old. I had one very unhappy camper when it came time to don Halloween costumes but a few thousand tears later and he was rarin' to go.

Oh, the agony!


We trick-or-treated with friends just as we do every year. It's fun to compare pictures from previous years to see how they've all grown.


This year I was escorted on our Halloween venture by Harry Potter, Indiana Jones and a cowboy. Handsome little lads.


Peanut's birthday was very low key but that's what he wanted. Out of all my boys he's probably the easiest going and fun loving. Laid back, really not a care in the world. When asked what kind of cake he wanted, his answer: green. Well, that was easy. So green cake we had. And he was pleased as punch.







At his birthday party, the amazing dad came up with a game which doubled as yard clean up. Now that's my kind of game! Throw the walnuts into the bucket. They stayed out there forever tossing the walnuts about. They had a blast!



When it was time to go in Jagger was the first to want to help. I'll bet that bucket of walnuts weighed close to what he does!


So, currently, at present, its a whopping 75 degrees on this November late afternoon. The sun is already beginning to set at 4:54. I've had a bit of Christmas fever and surprisingly, I've started a wish list! I NEVER have wish-lists. An occasion such as birthday or Christmas will roll around and if I'm asked what I want, my normal response is a shoulder shrug followed with something close to, "Oh, I don't know. I don't NEED anything!"

But as of late, I have run across several things that I don't need but...kinda...want. Very random things. Like an apron. Or a fabulous camera strap. Both of which I found while perusing Etsy. Man, I LOVE that website! So many creative things! Not to mention the talented people out there!





So, all the wish list making brings me to future. I'm excited. I'm already anticipating cinnamon scented candles lit, Christmas music playing softly in the background while me and my three littles place ornaments in just the perfect spots.

I'm looking forward to the annual Christmas shopping spree with another family while my kids pick out gifts for a child who doesn't have what we have and who otherwise would have a very gray Christmas. It's important to me for my children to learn to give rather than just receive during the Holidays.

I'm looking forward to a warm and inviting Thanksgiving meal with lots of family gathered 'round. The smell of cornbread dressing in the oven and fresh rolls baking. The sound of the Detroit Lions playing football coming from the family room. Babies being passed from one set of twitching hands to the other so those of us who are done having babies can get our "fix". :)



Past, present and future. It's all good, baby!

The Whole Truth, and Nothing but the Truth

Here's a glimpse of what last weekend held for us:











Last week I set out on a 5 hour drive with my three boys to visit my brother for a few days. With The Wiggles playing over and over on the DVD player I got lost in my thoughts, I think in an attempt to keep my sanity intact.

I started thinking about other blogs that I read. I had recently run across a post pleading for truthfulness from fellow bloggers, perhaps unintentionally suggesting that some bloggers paint pictures of family life that are not true. I'll admit. I was a little off-put by the notion at first. (Not that I took it personally. I mean I doubt this blogger has ever even seen my blog or read the first sentence about my family meanderings.)

I took offense because I do realize that my writings are very much in "glass-half-full" style. You won't see a post on how two of my three littles came down with some 24 hour bug and were sick most of the first morning we were at my brother's. You will read about what a fabulous visit we had, visiting the zoo, eating picnic lunches at the park, eating out with our new family, receiving stellar hospitality from my future sister. I write about beautiful things. Truthful, beautiful things. I like it that way. I like focusing on the positives rather than the negatives. We have so many tough things to face in the world today. I find that dwelling (and writing) in the sunlight, so to speak, makes me act on positive things and in turn makes me happier. So I'll take my rose-tinted glasses, thank you very much. And I'll wear them proudly.

But if "truth" is what you seek, "truth" is what you shall get. So here it is, folks. The cold, hard, ugly truth. *Deep breath*, here it comes...I'm not perfect. *Gasp!* Shocking, I know! And here I had you all fooled! Ha.

We are perfectly normal and flawed, just like everyone else. We have battles with bedtimes, battles with sharing toys, bumps and bruises, tears and shouting. We get sick (evidence below),

we go to doctors' offices, we get cases of the "mully-grubs" (as my mother told me recently). My house is messy, laundry piles up, toys are scattered everywhere, beds are not made, toilets need scrubbed. (I promise I could SCARE you with pictures of my house at times!) I battle with discipline, I battle with weight, I battle with self-esteem, I battle with balancing work and home, I battle with worry, I battle with money management, I battle with (yes, it's true) Negativity. I battle with all of these things but I do not write about them for one simple reason. I feel like these aren't the things that define me. They do not define who I am, how I parent, how I love my husband and kids, nor are they worth writing about. I do not want to give Negativity one second to sink it's claws into our world. If it takes hold, it is hard to pry off!

So, here's another truth. I like my messy, unorganized, flawed life. I think it's pretty perfect even if it wouldn't be by another person's standards. You have to take your life and own it. You have to own it all--the good and the bad. You have to accept failures, yes, but if you expect them and dwell on them...well, ever heard that life is what you make of it? I anticipate successes and beautiful moments. By writing about them it makes me much more likely to put my writing in to action and actually make them happen. Sure, they may not always turn out like the moment I have dreamed of but I can guarantee you with 100% certainty they won't be as bad as Negativity would have had me believe they would be!

So, we'll put on our old clothes and we'll open the paints. We'll paint pumpkins and yes, even our faces. :) We'll make 5 hour drives alone with three arguing boys to see family. We'll take the fussing and fighting and fit throwing because we know that in the midst of it all something much more beautiful is happening. We are living life. Our perfectly flawed life that is taylor-made for us to either enjoy or despise. I'll choose to enjoy.

Life is hard enough on it's own, without dwelling in the negative. Grab a pair of rose-tinted glasses and see for yourself how great life can be. I can promise you it will look more beautiful, smell more sweet, and taste more delicious. Doesn't mean that there will never be any bad. Doesn't mean there won't be mistakes and fall-outs and fist fights between brothers. But when you have these beautiful moments to hold on to it will rescue you from the worst "mully-grub" moments at just the right time!